Short quotes with photos and biographies

I hate when I'm on a flight and I wake up with a water bottle next to me like oh great now I gotta be responsible for this water bottle.

Biography | Humor

If he (Gary Neville) was an inch taller he'd be the best centre half in Britain. His father is 6ft 2in - I'd check the milkman.

Biography | Humor

We must always follow the law, and not only when caught in one place.

Biography | Humor

I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up.

Biography | Humor

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.

Biography | Humor

I was not trying to rape the elephant in the National Park. And the Statue of Liberty, too. I'm not going to steal the moon from the Americans. And I do not bombed Pearl Harbor, together with the Japanese.

Biography | Humor

I know the human being and fish can co-exist peacefully.

Biography | Humor

The human race has one really effective weapon, and that is laughter.

Biography | Humor

I have the simplest tastes. I am always satisfied with the best.

Biography | Humor

YOU READY?!

Biography | Humor